Reviews
From Book Life/Midwest Book Review:
Divorce lawyer Wilson offers readers a holistic guidebook on navigating divorce, from the early stages of deciding whether to contact an attorney to practical insights on the four most common divorce processes: DIY (Do It Yourself), mediation, collaboration, and litigation. He starts by reminding couples why they married each other, encouraging them to channel what worked well during their marriage into driving an amicable divorce.
“Cooperation generates greater harmony,” he writes, leading to all-around more positive outcomes: less cost, more efficiency, and the ability to preserve part of the “Invisible Estate” couples build together – that “intricate tapestry of interwoven lives, memories, experiences, and treasured moments.”
Wilson’s divorce crash course offers several practical tips – considering the financial futures of all involved parties, interviewing potential attorneys, navigating court, exploring laws that differ across state lines – but much of his guide veers into the waters of personal growth and transformation. Underlying his advice is the admonition to “be your best self always,” as he delves into relationship dynamics, marriage building blocks, the power of a memorable honeymoon, and even the neuroscience behind love.
“When couples conclude their journey together and make use of the core principles they created as their journey began, those couples truly own their own divorces,” he writes.
Own Your Own Divorce gives couples the opportunity to plan, communicate, and map out proceedings while safeguarding their emotional and mental health. Wilson aims to empower and uplift, approaching a potentially sensitive subject in a way that feels genuine and compassionate. He encourages readers to make amends – both with their past and with their partner – to truly move forward after divorce, imploring them to maintain integrity, treat their former spouse with kindness, and work to preserve their Invisible Estate.
“There is no finer act of love or kindness divorcing couples can extend to one another,” he writes, “than generosity of spirit.” That parting advice rings true for readers from any background.
Takeaway: Thoughtful divorce resource guide encouraging fairness and compassion.
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From a renowned divorce attorney and author:
In Own Your Own Divorce, seasoned family law specialist Larry Wilson explains in straightforward, no-nonsense terms the truth known to all divorce professionals (lawyers, mental health and financial specialists) who have provided services in the family courts and then walked away, refusing to participate in the carnage any further: Divorce court is where they shoot the survivors.
There is much wise counsel in this book, and many practical recommendations for how to take the high road in divorce—not just to be nice or turn the other cheek, but to embrace the reality that everyone in the reconfiguring family system comes out stronger and healthier and more ready for the next chapter of life when both spouses rise to their highest level of shared values and take responsibility for how to move from married to single without spending time in the toxic swamp of divorce litigation.
Of all the recommendations offered by the author, there is one keystone upon which all else depends: If a divorce must happen—even one you didn’t anticipate and don’t want—the place to begin is not by listening to the Greek chorus of well-meaning relatives and friends who will be happy to tell you that they always knew the marriage was a mistake and that your chosen life partner was worthless. They will steer you to lawyers they know little about, except that they talked a tough game and fought to the end on every issue of a friend or neighbor’s divorce. That is the direct, nonstop route to a very bad divorce.
The place to begin is to ask yourself—when you are feeling those fleeting moments of optimism about the future—What kind of divorce do I want to have, and what kind of professional help can best guide me and my spouse in that direction? The answers to that question can be found in Wilson’s book.
Read and share this book if you (or someone you love) may be heading for a divorce. Better yet, buy two. It will guide both divorcing partners to think carefully about how they want to look back, ten or twenty years from now, at their own behavior as their marriage ends. And it will help them both to choose the high road, which is the pathway for both partners to do a far better job of divorcing than they were probably able to manage during the last difficult years of their marriage.
This is the secret wisdom that every caring family lawyer knows, and that collaborative lawyers and many mediators have dedicated their careers to implementing, and that Larry Wilson has now made available to all.
Pauline H. Tesler, JD, retired specialist in family law (certified by the State Bar of California); longtime California “SuperLawyer” included for decades in “Best Lawyers in America.” Co-founder and first President of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals; author of Collaborative Divorce: The Revolutionary New Way to Restructure Your Family, Resolve Legal Issues, and Move on with Your Life and Collaborative Law: Achieving Effective Resolution in Divorce without Litigation, Third Edition; founding Director of the Integrative Law Institute at Commonweal; and recipient of the American Bar Association Dispute Resolution Section’s first Lawyer as Problem Solver award.
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From the judges of the Nonfiction Authors Association in awarding this book a SILVER:
Leaping into an acquisitive divorce-lawyer-driven onslaught is not the only alternative for separating yourself intact from a marriage that has run its course. Own Your Own Divorce by Laurence Wilson JD may be a sane, empowering, even eye-opening, place to start. Doing nothing can be agony. . . . [this book is] a comprehensive guide that helps individuals navigate the complexities of divorce by emphasizing personal empowerment and strategic decision-making.
The book, structured into nine parts, moves beyond simple legal advice to provide a holistic framework for understanding and managing the end of a marriage. It stands out for its unique approach, which combines psychological and financial insights with practical legal guidance.
The book’s initial sections distinguish it from many other divorce guides. Wilson doesn’t just jump into the legal process; he first delves into the psychological and emotional underpinnings of relationships and breakups . . . helping readers understand the emotional turmoil they’re experiencing and why they might struggle to think clearly.
A significant portion of the book is dedicated to providing readers with a strategic roadmap for their divorce. . . . This holistic approach, which addresses the psychological, financial, and legal aspects of divorce, makes the book an invaluable resource. It’s not a quick-fix manual but rather a thoughtful and empowering guide that encourages readers to take control of their journey, navigate the process safely, and emerge stronger on the other side.